Blizzard Peon: Sir..
Ghostcrawler: Yes, what is it? You’re interrupting my lunch {Sips gin}
Blizzard Peon: Sir.. the plebs have noticed that the Succubus does the best damage.. and Sir.. they’re all summoning her.
Ghostcrawler: What?? All of them? What about Demonology they have that.. big guy, what’s his name?
Blizzard Peon: Yes Sir, the Felguard. No sir, they’re summoning the Succubus as well.
Ghostcrawler: That’s impossible.. She’s an outrage.. it’s the boobs right? They’re summoning her to look at the boobs.
Blizzard Peon: No, Sir, she um.. well she’s actually doing the best damage because of her glyph. and it gets worse sir.. they’re all using only the Infernal.
Ghostcrawler: This is UNACCEPTABLE! FIX IT.
Blizzard Peon: Yes Sir. {scurrying away}

{Some time later}
Blizzard Peon #1: He -did- say to fix it… and he didn’t say how…
Blizzard Peon #2: Yeah.. but usually “fix it” means “nerf somethign”. I’m not sure if he’s going to like this.

Blizzard Peon #1: Sir we’ve.. well we think we’ve fixed the Succubus thing.
Ghostcrawler: Wash? {hic} Wash Succubus thing?
Blizzard Peon #1: Well sir, we nerfed their Fel Armor so that they got less health back.. which means they tap more.. making them want mana more.. so now we’ve made ManaFeed so that it works better
Blizzard Peon #2: (Interrupting) a lot better
Blizzard Peon #1: Yes,.. a lot better when they’re using the Felguard or felhunter.
Ghostcrawler looks on silently.
Blizzard Peon #1 continues: Well and then we buffed the Shadow Bite on the felhunter.
Blizzard Peon #2: A Lot
Blizzard Peon #1: (glaring at peon #1) Yes.. I suppose it could be considered a lot. Sir, we doubled the damage and effect. That should totally make the Affliction plebs use the felhunter.
Ghostcrawler picks up his now empty glass and looks into the bottom of it.
Ghostcrawler (mumbling): Afflic-shun.
Blizzard Peon #1: Yes and well.. we didn’t feel we could nerf the 10 minute pets anymore.
Ghostcrawler grudging adds: They are pretty weak to start with.
Blizzard Peon #1: Yes.. well.. um.. we increased the Doomguard’s damage by 50%.. so it’s now the best single target guardian.
Ghostcrawler looks up and blurrily tries to locate his gin bottle.
Blizzard Peon #1 clears his throat: Also sir.. since we were in the code anway.. we buffed Haunt and Shadow Mastery. I was feeling pretty guilty about that 12% nerf from a while back.
Blizzard Peon #2 stares at Blizzard Peon #1: Guilty? YOU FELT GUILTY? Seriously.. you’re a newb.
Ghostcrawler waves his hand and shoos the peons away.
Ghostcrawler: Yeah yeah.. fine.. whatever. It’s just a game.

Source: Early Patch 4.1 notes.

**All events are in the mind of the author. Any similarity to actual events is total coincidence.
***BTW: I <3 Ghostcrawler. No really.. I do.

7 thoughts on “OH THE DRAMA!**

  1. GC would of course be sitting on a throne clutching his royal scepter, the Nerfbat, in his other hand.

    Still, these changes all look pretty reasonable to me.

  2. I took it that Haunt would be doing 30% more damage to the dots not when you apply it.

    The tooltip currently reads that it increases all damage done by 20%. I just assumed (probably shouldn’t) that the 30% is the increase to that.

    I kind of hope they take it that route.

    I wonder if the change to mana feed would really make people take the other less-dps producing pets. Mana really isn’t an issue for warlocks. This change confuses me.

    The increase to the puppy’s attack is awesome though! 😀

  3. If it were the DoT-increasing damage, I think the tooltip would have said Haunt “bonus damage” (a la the Glyph’s phrasing).

  4. Errr, trying to edit (won’t let me, just blacks out & stays that way).

    I think the *patch note* not the tooltip would read Haunt “bonus damage” (a la the Glyph of Haunt’s phrasing) increased by 30%, were it the dot-buff effect & not Haunt’s actual application hit.

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